How about meandering along the palm-fringed Kerala backwaters on a houseboat cruise with your own cook, waiter and captain? These boats were originally carriers of grain but are now renovated to provide you with all modern comforts. Sit on deck, sip a tender coconut water and watch Indian families on the riverbanks as they go about their daily tasks - the ladies washing their clothes on the rocks, the men fishing in traditional boats. Then eat fresh pearlspot fish from the backwaters as the balmy tropical night wraps itself around you.

Spend an afternoon bird watching on a traditional punt on one of Kerala's many waterways. We'll make sure you have a picnic of Kerala delicacies when you go cruisin' down the river.

But here's the real test. Are you brave enough to do a stint on a traditional bullock cart? We can provide the original agricultural type for the brave hearted. Now this is the real India of centuries ago, it's history is documented s far as back as the famous ancient epics of the Rig Veda and in places today it's still the only means of transport available to some farm families. If it's too uncomfortable for the modern seat, so to speak, we can actually provide a sooped-up version. This one's 8 ft tall with 20 sq ft area to sit in. It's up to you. Either way, the bullocks stay.

And then there's the all-time favourite, a ride on the back of the Great Tusker. Indian elephants are a bit like us humans. They are sexually mature at about 11 or 12 years old, are at the peak of their physical condition at age 25 and start to get a bit dowdy at age 60. Unfortunately for them their pregnancies last about two years and generally they weigh sixty times more than you do. We will provide you with your own mahoot who will show you how to decorate the elephant, after which you will be escorted with garlands of jasmine around your neck through the streets. Take as long as you like. They cover about four miles per hour.

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Indian Transport holidays
Around the State in 7 Ways
They say that if you want to get to know a people, you must learn their language. We don't recommend learning Malayalam, the local language, on your holiday unless you have a long, long time to spend! However the next best way to get a real feel for the place is to travel the Indian way. And that means about the most varied holiday you can imagine. Never a dull moment! That's our promise.

Want contemporary comfort? Then it's the backseat of a roomy Ambassador taxi car for you. It's the classic Indian taxi with something of the appearance of a very large white bug, hugely spacious, strong and safe with a driver who will even carry your shopping and treat you like a maharaja from start to finish.

The famous Indian Railway, one of the first most effective rail networks in the world, is an experience not to be missed. Fancy a romantic puff-puff on a steam train to a hill station? It doesn't move at supersonic speed but you'll have a chance to enjoy the spectacular scenery, coffee and tea plantations and magnificent hills with unusual flora and fauna. All aboard here!

Or take the Rajdani Express train and enjoy the constant attention of the chai-wallahs who parade up and down the corridor wearing smiles and serving you sweet milky tea while you luxuriate in an air-conditioned carriage. But we must do the booking for you. The Indian Railway timetable is tougher to handle than Astro-Physics. You can have General Compartment which you don't want. Or 2nd Class Chair or 2nd Class Sleeper, 2nd Class AC Chair or maybe Sleeper ……..zzzzzzzz

The three-wheeled auto rickshaw gives you natural air-conditioning. There are no doors! That same factor also gives you a constant shot of adrenalin. But you'll be glad of its daintiness in thick city traffic because its turning circle is so small that its wheel can cut a 180 degree angle. A further bonus is the chit-chat in English of its cheerful drivers who generally act as unofficial agents for anything from best Indian saris to mangoes.

Then sit amongst the crowd of friendly faces on a typical Indian bus, but please don't go for a back seat. It's bumpy. And please don't go for a front seat. The constant honking of the horn will drive you demented. That is, if you can hear it over the Hindi music that continues day and night. However this experience is a MUST HAVE but we think a shorter one rather than the long-haul will suffice.


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